Medway 15 Aylesford III 18
The Extras completed their long league campaign last Saturday, with a home fixture to their arch-Nemesis Aylesford IIIs.
The match doubled as a sponsor’s event for the Extras, and the home team were keen to show off their new skin tight lycra match tops courtesy of ‘The Who’d Ha’ Thought It’ local Pub in Baker Street, and 8th ELEMENT, the sports and exercise massage clinic. The snug fit suggested that Jamie Settle could do with less time in one and more time in the other.
The match was also poignant, as the final match in-charge after three years for popular Captain and flange-expert Matt Jackson.
The match took a familiar course, with Medway’s expansive game….countered by the old-school forward power of the visitors.
Medway opened the scoring, as a deft chip by flyhalf Geoff Kempt was gathered by the outstanding Michael Davies, he beat two defenders to score close to the posts. Up stepped Jackson, ready as always to make his mark, saucepan, cock.
The visitors responded strongly, and were able to level the scores as their No8 crashed over from short range, after a series of strong drives.
Medway applied pressure for the next ten minutes, before a defensive lapse allowed Aylesford’s speedy centre to break through and race in out wide for a fine try. Fortunately, the Aylesford kicker had attended The Matty Jackson School Of Kicking, he missed.
Half time, and Medway were behind on their big day….this wasn’t in the script….fresh legs were introduced in the returning emaciated figure of Craig Drummond….who must have been playing for Addis Ababa RFC in his time off.
Medway applied huge pressure from the kick-off, with Davies and Settle instrumental in setting up quick ruck ball……as the ball was spun wide, Drummond was stopped short but was able to off-load to flyhalf Kempty who dived over for the equalising score. Jacko stepped up, but like Prince Albert at a urinal, he sprayed it wide.
Medway’s pack drove downfield against their bigger opponents, with the soft-headed Matt Kelly and floppy-fingered Chris Green leading the way. Their reward was a penalty in front of the posts, as Aylesford killed the ball. Perhaps it was the occasion or the critical stage in the match, but Jackson hit the post,…. when the chips are down he crumbles like a crisp packet on a grill. Amazingly the rebound popped into Medway hands, and two quick passes later, centre Dave Gwilliam crashed over to put Medway in front. Jackson declined the conversion to save time.
Aylesford had not threatened throughout the second half, but are always dangerous….as they staged a late comeback, despite sterling work by Thompson, French, Meringue and Krasij. They drove over for another forward-dominated try, after a series of lineouts and scrums. Conversion missed.
Medway continued to contest at every breakdown, and with the final whistle imminent, the referee harshly adjudged Medway to be offside in mid-field. Despite neither kicker getting close to the posts all day….the Aylesford flyhalf chose this moment to spoil the party, as he stroked over the penalty with virtually the last kick of the match.
Full time 15 – 18.
The disappointment of defeat soon passed, as Medway toasted their sponsors and drenched Jackson to celebrate three years of hugely enjoyable rugby under his masterly leadership……the team wish him well in the Fourth team next season.
Scribe.
GKempt.
Medway 13 Cranbrook II 7
“Now children you must never play with knives as you can hurt yourself”. So started Captain Matt Jackson’s pre match team talk as he tried to explain his inability to start the game, following an emotional midweek incident with his boyfriend.
With much of his regular team playing in the 1sts this week so it was that he found himself selecting a team of very little experience and plenty youth, as Medway’s highly successful development squad filled the gaps. One thing this team does not lack is spirit and a determination to defend its own line at all costs and so it proved today as they recorded what is arguably their best win of the season against a highly motivated Cranbrook side.
From the kick off they ran hard and fast at Medway and pushed them back in all phases of play, using their bigger and more experienced forwards to then release their younger backs. It was not long before they scored a good try in the corner following a passage of inter passing and then the try was converted with an excellent conversion from the touchline. 0-7. The signs were ominous. It was from this point that the Extras settled into their game plan of aggressive tackling and competing at every breakdown, whilst being very disciplined in all aspects. Captain Jamie Settledown lead from the front and was an excellent role model for his hard pressed troops and soon their efforts were rewarded. Man mountain Mike Davis once again made a nuisance of himself and forced a series of errors which resulted in a penalty, which John Rumsey converted. 3- 7. From the kick off Cranbrook came back strongly and camped on the Medway line. Only desperate defence by winger Dave Jinks prevented a certain try and his turnover meant that David Gwilliam could kick ahead and as the Cranbrook winger waited to catch the ball Rich Coney shot out of his burrow and claimed the ball and ran 70 yards for a try that was converted by Rumsey J. 10 –7.
It was at this point that the cracks in the Cranbrook play began to appear as they became ever more vocal and indisciplined. Medway continued to be aggressive in the tackle with centres Gwilliam and Craddock being to the fore and the penalty count built in their favour. Rumsey J. converted one of these and was unlucky not to convert at least one more chance. HT – 13 – 7.
The half time call from coach Eee Bai Gum Tasker was “composure, let them self destruct” and the Extras showed great maturity in the 2nd half as Cranbrook did all that they could to win the game. No matter what the provocation was they tackled the opposition until they literally dropped. The Cranbrook centres in particular came in for some very uncompromising treatment from Ben “hitman” Craddock, which certainly seemed to affect their play. Then the injuries started to pie up as they lost hooker Graham Hellyer to a blow on the head and stand off Rumsey S. to, what looked at the time a very nasty injury and thankfully was not. So players found themselves playing out of position and young wing debutant Dan the Man went into the pack and showed the same determination as his team mates not to lose. Then play had to be stopped whilst flanker Matt Kelly tried to find his head after yet another crunching defensive tackle and it was some minutes before he was able to tuck it back on his shoulders and rejoin the fray to help his team mates. Towards the end of the game even Jacko limped on to the pitch (non matching socks – team fine) and on one leg did his bit. You cannot pretend that the 2nd half was a fine display of technical rugby, apart from the line out which was very good, because it wasn’t. What you saw was a superb example of backs to wall gritty team spirit and a growing awareness amongst the players of how to play what was in front of them and play smarter as Cranbrook camped in their 22 for most of the half. A fine example of this was when David Gwilliam put in a fine clearing kick from behind his own try line and then was accidentally bumped into by a Cranbrook player a short while after completing his kick. His Bafta performance of a man being shot by a sniper certainly made the referee fully aware of what had gone on.
The last 6 minutes of the game the Extras were pinned onto their try line and it was only their excellent determination and continual pressing that prevented their dogged opponents from executing their moves to better effect.
You could not pick a man of the match – this was a true team win.
E.I.Addio – your man on the Borstal terracing with a quiet but very proud smile on his face.
Medway 27 Ash 17
An exciting blend of Medway youth and experience found their opponents to be dogged and determined opponents and some of the team were genuinely surprised when, after the match, they were told that Ash had played with only 14 men throughout the game. On this performance why Ash are not higher in the league is a mystery to all who watched.
Starting with a strong breeze on their backs Medway ran hard into the opposition defensive line. David Gwilliam was prominent and after a strong surge he broke the line and ignoring the overlap he took the tackle and then off loaded to the try sniffing captain – Matt Jackson – for him to score. Overcome with the excitement of the moment he unsurprisingly missed the conversion. 5-0.
The play became fast and furious and as Medway pressed their opponents back they were guilty of misreading the Ash full backs silvery locks as a sign of advancing senility and where taken aback as he cut through them at speed from 40 yards out and comfortably scored a fine try. 5 - 5.
Frankly this was not a game for the purist, although you could not criticise the effort and commitment of both sets of players. Medway’s backs were the sharper and should have scored more points in the first half but their unwillingness to use their supporting players when they had 3 man overlaps cost them several scoring opportunities. When they used the overlap they scored. Rich “rapid” Coney was put in the clear and faced with 2 defenders showed the benefit of his secret ballroom dancing lessons as he sashayed towards them and then twirled out of their attempted tackles for a fine solo try. Jackson was deadly with the conversion from in front of the posts. 12 -5. Then David Gwilliam once again broke the line and once again ignoring his supporting team mates, who must have been wearing the wrong under arm deodorant, managed to crash over for a try. From 10 yards out and in front of the posts there is no one deadlier than Jacko. 19 - 5. This was the half time score and with no disrespect to Ash the Medway scoreline should have been much higher.
The 2nd half saw Medway playing into the strengthening wind and rain and their inexperience and lack of patience started to tell. Despite the efforts of the front row and the excellent line out combination between Hearn and Davis they found themselves increasingly pinned into their own 22 and Ash began to use their heavier forwards to good effect through rolling mauls and close driving. Occasional break outs by Medway came to nought through a combination of poor decision making and execution. When winger Dave Jinks was put clear with one man to beat he appeared to be drawn to the full back by some magnetic force which meant that the wide open spaces of the pitch suddenly became uninviting. Eventually Ash got their just rewards with a fine maul and drive to crash over the line for an unconverted try. 22 -10. Medway’s lack of composure was there for all to see as they handled the ball as if it was molten lead. Substitutions then resulted, with Bunce, Smith and veteran Chris Green celebrating his new sponsorship deal with Elastopast, taking the field. From a raid into the Ash half quick ball from the forwards was moved across the field to Sam Bunce who rounded his opposite number and scored a fine wingers try in the corner. As expected Jacko missed the conversion from the touchline. He was substituted and replaced by man mountain Little Thompson who showed his team mates how to tackle and how to bounce into and out of a tackle. All credit to Ash they came back strongly and from a well drilled line out and maul crashed over for another try, which was converted in fine style from near the touchline (Jacko take note). Final scoreline 27- 17.
A good honest contest between 2 committed teams but Medway nearly rued those missed chances. David Gwilliam was awarded “Dick of the Day” twice - once for the first half and one for the 2nd when his back flip pass on the Medway try line to his winger resulted in the winger needing counselling for stress after the match.
E. I. Addio - your man on the Borstal end terracing trying to dodge the dog poo.
Medway 30 Thanet Wanderers III 24
At last a performance from Medway’s Extra 1st Team to put a smile on Captain Matt Jackson’s face. No group-hugs or calls to The Samaritans for Jacko this week.
Keen for revenge, after a mauling by Thanet earlier in the season….Medway selected a team full of youth and hair gel, and Andy Connell.
The game plan was simple……knock-down Thanet’s big carrot-crunchers early, turn the ball over, and attack from everywhere to stretch their powerful forwards.
The match also marked a significant moment in the Club’s history, with the inclusion of four players from Ginger and Chris’ Development Squad……Alex Waterman, Michael Smith, Jon Rumsey and George Dyer……their contribution would prove to be crucial in a fiercely competitive game.
Medway started strongly, and were on the scoreboard early, as the forwards drove the visitors back onto their line. Quick ball was spun to flyhalf Richard Bates, he found fat Facebook Paedo Tom Willoughbelly on the crash, and the centre touched down beneath the posts. Jackson found his range immediately from infront to add the two points.
As Thanet tried to gain a foothold, the game started to take shape, as Medway again and again, knocked down their bigger opponents on or behind the gain-line. From a turnover, the ball was put wide to No8 Howard Thompson, he drew the last man, and put Jon Rumsey in the clear. Like an excited sperm, Rumsey shot forward to score out wide. Unfortunately Jackson put a condom on the celebrations, as he missed the conversion.
Thanet’s response was a series of strong forward drives, which despite Medway’s best efforts, yielded an unconverted try for the visitors.
Half Time 12 – 5.
A strong second half performance was required….but the cause was not helped as Thanet opened up, with a second try in similar fashion.
Urged on by Coach and Clint Eastwood lookalike Dirty Harry Tasker…..’go ahead punk, make my day’…..Medway looked to open up play at every opportunity. Great breaks by Williams and Rutherford, set up excellent field position……..and as Medway’s forwards continued to tackle and ruck for all they were worth, Thanet eventually conceded a penalty for stamping. Jacko stepped up, and stroked over a sublime penalty to put Medway 5 points ahead.
With Mark Krasij, Michael Smith and Matt Kelly tackling anything that moved….Thanet started to kick for territory. On one occasion they picked out Rich Coney lurking on the wing. This error was punished immediately, as Coney counter-attacked in typical fashion. He rounded two defenders, and beat the cover defence in scintillating style, to sprint in for a brilliant try. Jacko in-front, blah, blah, blah.
Thanet upped their game, and started to string together some powerful mauls and drives….working more as a unit to counter Medway’s aggressive defence. It was only a matter of time before this technique worked, and they were rewarded with a converted try soon after. (22 – 17.)
As the game swung one way and the other, it was Medway turn to strike next. A clever kick into the corner by Jackson, saw Medway turn the ball over from the lineout. Batesy intelligently missed out kiddy-fiddler Willoughbelly, and picked out the devilishly handsome Danny Williams out wide…….Williams turned-on half of Coney’s gas, and raced in at the corner for a great try. Saucepan. (27 – 17.)
If Medway thought the game was safe, they were wrong….Thanet are top of the table for a reason, as they exerted relentless forward pressure. Their usual scrum dominance was cancelled out by an outstanding performance from Medway’s smaller pack, with Alex Waterman a tower of strength at tight-head, and George Dyer and Pete Corker exceptional in the engine-room. It was a mistake at the back that ultimately let Thanet back in, …. As Medway once again attempted to run everything, a quick line-out was spilled, and Thanet were able to kick through…..although Medway defended the initial thrusts at their line, the Thanet forward power eventually led to a further converted try. (27 – 24.)
Noodles quote…’’if I had a seat, I’d be on the edge of it…’’
Medway then lost Matt Kelly with a bang to the head,….he might not be able to, pass, kick, run, jump, dance or dress properly……but you can’t lick Kelly’s tackle !
With time running out Medway struggled to repel an increasingly desperate Thanet side……however, one more turnover gave Medway enough space to gain field position. Come the moment, cometh the man…..no, not Jackson, but Batesy…….the knock-out punch was delivered as Richard Bates struck a sweet drop-goal from 30 metres out to seal the victory.
The final whistle brought much celebration, a measure of the effort and character that had been put into the performance. A welcome return to the true Extras spirit, missing so far in 2010.
Man of the match could have gone to any number of players, Waterman, Corker, Connell etc….but was awarded to Matt Kelly for his outstanding display in defence.
Well done lads.
Scribe
G. Kempt.
Cranbrook II 20 Medway 20
Cranbrook 2nds 20 v Medway Extras 20.
“A report in the manner of legendary scribe Geoff “call me Chaucer” Kempt”.
This week saw the Extras venture into the heart of the Kentish Weald for a nearly top of the table clash. Amazingly all the team arrived at the ground in good time – including the legendary explorer Monesh Shome. They were greeted by what, at first glance, appeared to be a green sward. It was only when enthusiastically they trotted out for one of Jacko’s by now legendary warm ups that they realised that next week it might be planted with rice. In fairness to the home side the pitch was in good condition considering the rain they had earlier in the day.
With a blend of youth, young chaps and Chris Green they took the game to the home side from the kick off. Everyone in the ground was taken unawares by the sudden surge of pace and nimbleness of Aron Sage as he dashed a good 20, or was it 15 yards, through the opposition line and set up the pattern of play for the first half as the Extras camped in the opposition half for long periods. However their lack of skill and patience, coupled with some classic moments of stupidity meant that they could not score. Then from a strong forward surge the assembled crowd were shocked to see Luke “I’ve been dropped for not training” Burns drop back into the pocket and call for the ball. Much to everyone’s shock he coolly dropped the goal from the 22. 0 – 3. Further pressure gave Medway a penalty, which Jacko converted (he had to, he had already missed a sitter). 0 – 6. There was then a phase of Medway doing everything possible to not score. Particularly noteworthy was from a searing break of pace, strength and Nijinksy like balance (the horse not the dancer!) Burnsey made the first good/bad decision of his season. With 10 yards to the line he passed the ball to his wing – David Sodialou – who clearly resented the opportunity for such a short, unopposed trot in and dropped the ball. This unanimously merited the “Dick of the Day” award, which is probably better than what the forwards wanted to give him at this point. Other clear chances were spurned.
Half Time 0 – 6 – with a Medway side cursing their failure to have already put the game to bed.
Quickly they discovered that their opponents were made of stern stuff and are not 2nd in the league for nothing and they attacked with no little skill and endeavour and this led to their left winger crashing over the line for a good try despite the hugs of 2 Medway defenders. The try was converted beautifully from the touch line (Jacko please take note). The pattern of play was set with Medway this time being pinned back in their own quarter and the inevitable happened, a penalty conceded and quickly followed by a further try (converted again – Jacko take note). 17 – 6. Medway’s play became more desperate and this saw them then elect to take 3 penalty shots at goal from the half way. On a dry day at altitude on the South African veldt these would have been optimistic but at Cranbrook in the mud in December? Score unchanged.
Fresh legs were then brought into the fray as James “twinge” Rutherford, Sam “let me at them” Bunce and Glen “thumbs up “ Stapleton joined the merry festivities and a clearly disappointed Howard, a clearly cold and wet David S. and a “ I must beat myself up more” Mark left the field.
With 5 minutes to go a combination of inspiration, or was it fear, laid the foundations for a truly fine score. Returning a kick from his own 22 Rich “my muddy shorts are heavier than I am” Coney attacked the narrow side and put Ben “whippet” Bartram away. Up the touchline for 50 yards like a scalded cat he went, beating 4 admiring defenders and then fed the ball inside to the supporting Coney who raced under the posts. Jacko coolly slotted the conversion from 10 yards. 17 – 13.
From the kick off somebody forgot the principals of rugby and let Cranbrook have another go and this resulted in a penalty in front of the posts (young Mr. Kelly must stop offering himself as a door mat in ruck situations). 20 –13.
With watching club selector Dave Tasker by now doing his best Victor Meldrew impression and trying to think what to say at the end of the match in 60 seconds time, from the kick off this team, once again, showed that what they lack in finesse they make up for in sheer bloody mindedness. They got possession back and then showed composure, patience and attacked the Cranbrook line with real desire. Pete Corker saw the line beckoning and showed commendable restraint in not “doing a hero and screwing up play” and in also ignoring the calls from the by now try hanging Sage. The play went right and then left and Nick Thomas with a shimmy, side step and searing burst of space crashed over to the right of the posts. The last play was the conversion attempt and this team had every confidence that their skipper would……..blow me down he put it dead centre between the posts. Batesy how dare you suggest he did not have the bottle. Hurrah!
Normally against such strong and experienced opposition this would be no bad outcome. However this team can and will play a lot better if they learn to do the simple things better and forget the fancy stuff.
E.I.Addio (Your man up to his ankles in water and something smelly wondering how the ref. came off the field with hardly a splash on him)
Ash 5 Medway 17
Medway Extras ventured into deepest Kent last Saturday, in their continuing push for honours in Invicta League III.
Although missing a few regulars; Drummond, Gwilliam, Krasij through injury or unavailability…..Medway were able to show some rare strength in depth with the inclusion of; George, Bartram and Waterman.
Medway left Priestfields confident that so long as everyone stuck closely to Chris (Big Elg) Green’s rear bumper, that we would all arrive safely at our destination. The reality is that even Steve McQueen would struggle to keep up with Mr. Green. For future reference Chris, motorways have three lanes, and red lights generally mean stop.
Medway finally arrived in the sticks, and were able to remove their soiled underwear, in readiness for the match ahead.
Although Ash are near the foot of the table, their defensive record, especially at home is excellent…..and their narrow, muddy pitch was a clue as to why this is.
Medway started poorly, and put themselves under unnecessary pressure, through numerous silly penalties and basic errors. Ash has the chance to put themselves in front from one of the many penalties, but squandered the opportunity.
It was Medway’s scrum dominance which steadied the ship, with Nick Thomas, Paul Meringue and Alex Waterman, on debut, driving the Ash pack backwards at each opportunity. Medway were able to string some attacking phases together, and good breaks from Richard Bates and Rich Coney, gave them good field position in Ash’s twenty-two. As Medway tried to break the home defence, eventually a gap opened up between two Ash props. Skipper Matt Jackson was quick to spot two players on the pitch slower than himself, and he dived between them to register the first score.
Jacko stepped up to slot the conversion with customary aplomb.
The restart was secured excellently by Waterman, and powerful bursts from Dave French and Peter Corker, took Medway up to the half way line…..Medway won the breakdown, and executed a perfect Delta move in the backs, enabling fullback Rich Coney just enough space on the postage stamp to outpace the home defence, and run round under the posts for a well-worked try.
Jacko slotted the conversion from infront.
HALF-TIME 0 – 14.
The second half should have seen Medway extend their lead….but Ash defended strongly…..and Medway struggled against some intriguing refereeing decisions….’pushing in the scrum’ and ‘picking the ball up’ were some of the better ones Medway were penalised for.
Ash had a strong period after 15 minutes, and were rewarded with an unconverted try wide out, after some strong driving play from their forwards.
Medway made a few changes to bring on fresh legs through, Bear Stapleton, Chris Crash Green and Geoff Kempt.
This steadied the ship defensively, and Ash were never able to get out of their half for the remainder of the match. In attack Medway threatened on numerous occasions through Ben Bartram, Howard Thompson, James Rutherford and Glen Stapleton….but the final pass was either missed….or Ash were able to prevent quick ruck ball, and kill off any attacking moves.
A dour second half, was concluded as Ash were penalised for ‘mud on legs’….and Captain Jackson stepped up to kick the penalty to make the final score 5 – 17.
This was an important win for Medway…but one of their poorest performances. Against top of the table opposition over the next few weeks, Medway will need to play a more structured game….creating second and third phases, to generate realistic attacking space wider out. First up tackles round the legs must be made on the gain line….and basic schoolboy errors must be eradicated.
Man of the match was awarded to Rich Coney for an excellent defensive and attacking game from fullback.
Dick of the day was awarded to Rich Coney for throwing-up his man of the match pint.
G. Kempt
Scribe.
Medway 41 Whitstable II 22
Medway’s Extras took on cockle-picking Whitstable last Saturday in their continuing league programme. The effects of the hurricane force winds were exacerbated, as Medway had to play high up on ‘dog-shit-alley’….but this did not prevent the home-side from turning on the style for their trusty band of windswept supporters.
Medway, with the wind at their backs, opened at a crackling pace…..and exerted huge pressure on their visitors. Captain Jackson was able to open the scoring on 5 minutes, with a penalty in front, after Whitstable failed to roll away at a ruck.
Whitstable tried to drive into the elements by keeping it tight, but Medway’s tackling was more than a match, with flanker Graeme Hellyer and his Leo Sayer afro knocking down anyone trying to mess with his barnet. He was ably supported by male-model and stonewall forward Sam Bunce, who was equally as dogged in defence despite straining his perineum before kickoff….. and would like a scrum-cap from his mum for Christmas.
Immediately after, following good approach play from James Rutherford and mid-life Chris Green…the ball was shipped wide, for fullback Rich Coney to dive over in the corner. Jackson narrowly missed the extra points from out wide.
To their credit, Whitstable came back strongly, and exerted pressure for the next ten minutes….their reward was a try in the bottom corner (literally) from their dangerous No 8, as he broke from a scrum 30 metres out, and ran round a tranemark James Rutherford tackle.
On twenty minutes, as Whitstable tried to pass the ball around inside their 22, centre David Gwilliam cut down his opposite number,…. and like a pikey at a boot-fair, stole the ball off him to dive through under the posts. Jacko converted. Medway then had their best spell, as Jackson and the excellent Bates used the wind intelligently to kick for good field position….and relieve whatever pressure the visitor’s applied.
From a scrum in mid field, No 8 Howard Thompson broke open, and offloaded to Jackson, he passed to Bates on the rewind, who put the ball out to Geoff Kempt on the wing, he rounded his opposite number and put the ball back inside to Bates who made 20 metres before being tackled by Whitstable’s fullback, Batesy popped the ball up for Kempt to re-gather and scorch in at the corner for a cracking try….narrowly avoiding that dodgy bit of footpath in the process. Jackson slotted the conversion from wide out.
Medway pressed again, through their whinging prop Nick Thomas, and suave debonair second-row Mark Stewart….from a ruck 30 metres out, the ball was spun to centre Gwilliam,….he cut a devastating angle against the Whitstable drift, and was stopped only by a last ditch tackle by the visitor’s cover defence…once again Kempt was on hand to receive the offload, and race in on the opposite side this time. Jackson narrowly missed the kick into the wind.
Half Time 27 – 5 to Medway, a great first half, but would it be enough with the wind now in their faces. Medway made a couple of tactical changes at this point by bringing on the ginger yoyo Mike Harrison, and Scottie too Hottie in the second row to add some power and bulk into the elements.
Medway incredibly took the game to their opponents, into the worst of the storm. Powerful drives by centre Ben Craddock (who’s height to width ratio, is matched by his availability ratio)…gave Medway a platform to push Whitstable back deep into their twenty-two. A lengthy clearance kick, was scooped up by fullback Coney deep in his own half…..as Whitstable chased-up, Coney set off on an audacious counter attack……he rounded the centre and winger, before cutting inside the fullback and beating the cover defence to touch down under the posts. A truly outstanding burst of pace from deep,….and right into the teeth of the gale. Brilliant. Jackson converted.
Medway pressed again through Leo Sayer and Mark Krasij….the latter has made the prop-berth his own, but he still charges around like a loony, throwing dummies with gay abandon.
After 25 minutes Whitstable were caught offside on half way…..without hesitation Jackson hoofed a massive crosskick right across the pitch…..the always alert Geoff Kempt was able to take ‘Jackson’s punt’ in his stride,… still with work to do, he handed-off the winger and the fullback, and raced round behind the sticks, to secure his hatrick. Great try (…say so myself…) Jackson converted. It was apparent that the erratic nature of the wind had somehow cancelled out the erratic nature of Jackson’s kicking.
Medway then lost their influential centre David Gwilliam, with a nasty facial injury, as he pulled-off a great cover tackle on one of the Whitstable big-boys. A devastating runner, and excellent tackler….the team would like to wish him a speedy recovery……a visit to hospital might help Dave !
Medway then lost a bit of focus, as the game was in the bag, and they noticeably wilted after their sterling efforts….Whitstable, who never gave up all day….were allowed to run in three soft tries in the last ten minutes, to give a flattering gloss to the scoreline.
The excellent referee blew the final whistle, to signal the end of another fine Extra’s show.
Man-the-match (not awarded)…..Leo Sayer for best hair, and his tireless work throughout.
Dick-of-the-day (not awarded)…..David Gwilliam for dropping the ball when clean through in the first half……(and tackling with his face.)
Geoff Kempt
Scribe
Hatrick.
Medway 34 Sevenoaks 7
Always nice to beat a load of merchant bankers,….and so it proved to be the case last weekend for Medway’s Extras.
Despite half the team requiring therapy after Dave Tasker’s ‘inspiring’ prematch talk….the team took the field focused and expectant, and with the lingering smell of Joel Jenkins’ ox-blood buffalo-skin rhino-pelt jacket still in their nostrils.
Medway started strongly, with strong mauling and effective rucking from their mobile forwards……Gwilliam and Kempt going close early on.
After 10 minutes, a chip over the S’oaks backline saw centre Craig Drummond kick ahead, he won the race to the touchdown, and Medway were ahead. Jackson, celebrating his thirtieth birthday (Joyce), aimed the conversion at Andy Moles’ house, but hit The Canopus instead. Knob
Medway drove upfield again from the restart…with good runs from outstanding Ken Dodd-like hooker Graeme Hellyer, and tryless Dave French. Medway drove to within 10 yards of the visitor’s line, before Jacko popped a pass to centre David Gwilliam, who’s straight line running saw him score close in. Jackson stepped-up, aimed at Jane Wadhams’ house, but hit the council changing rooms instead. Another knob.
Sevenoaks threatened constantly, with their scrum-half pushing Medway back with a series of clever box kicks. From one such measured kick, a lineout 5 metres from Medway’s line, saw S’oaks regain possession and score in the corner. Their flyhalf aimed at the posts, and bisected them from the touchline with accuracy and skill.
Just before the interval, Medway lost their outstanding centre Craig Drummond with a dislocated elbow. This saw a reshuffle where flanker Tom Willoughby moved to centre, enabling substitute Sam Bunce to take up his rightful place in the forwards (stonewall second-row.)
HALF TIME 10 – 7.
The second period was all Medway…..spurred on by the inspirational words of Martin Valuev Farbrace….’’hurry up, I want to watch MILF 4’’.
Medway pressured the visitors from the off…..great set-piece lineout with Krasij hitting Howard Thompson and mid-life Chris Green, gave them a great platform from which to attack. Medway pushed S’oaks back with accurate kicking from flyhalf Richard Bates, and strong runs from the waxed James Rutherford. Eventually Sevenoaks ran out of numbers, as slick hands put manic-depressive fullback Darren Kistner in for a great try. Jackson tried a new technique, he aimed at the dogshit bin by the steps, and converted perfectly from the touchline.
An attempted dropgoal from Batesy soon afterwards just landed short…as Medway kept turning the screw. Sevenoaks cleared deep into Medway’s half, where the home side looked to counter,…. David Gwilliam spotted a gap, he broke the visitor’s defensive line, and passed on to Kistner, he was stopped by the S’oaks fullback, but was able to offload to Geoff Kempt, he sidestepped the covering defence to score beneath the posts. Jackson converted. Still a knob.
The outstanding Kistner dropped a high clearance kick shortly after, and went into Devil and Angel mode.
Sevenoaks lost their flyhalf with a broken ankle 5 minutes later, which disrupted their structure,….Medway drove onwards, through Willoughby and Nick Thomas….the ball came out to the right hand side….where David French, who hasn’t scored this season, unselfishly fed the ball to Kistner to register his second. Jackson knob.
With the game nearly over, Tom Willoughby who has spunked all his Uni-money on booze, and not read one book yet,…broke clear….with only the fullback to beat….and with two-try Kistner (Devil on one shoulder, Angel on the other) to his right…..an easy score was guaranteed. Willoughby sold the dummy, and got munched by the fullback…..so much for University…..Medway were able to secure the ball from the ensuing ruck, and hooker Hellyer put Howard Thompson away in the corner to score his first try of the season. Jackson knob.
Full time saw Medway run out as deserved 34 – 7 victors……as they left the pitch to much applause from their home supporters…… Kistner could be seen moulding a voodoo doll of Willoughby out of mud.
Man of the match…..Dave French, for his tireless work throughout….and unselfishness with the line at his mercy.
Dick of the day……Willoughby, for failing to give Kistner his hatrick….and for then laughing hysterically at the bottom of the following ruck.
Geoff Kempt
Scribe.
Deal & Betteshanger 28 Medway 20
A depleted Medway Extras team travelled east on Saturday in their continuing league programme. They were surprised, having left Medway in warm sunshine, to arrive on the Kentish Riviera in horizontal driving rain, to take on Seal & Wettwanger.
The conditions were always likely to favour the large opposition side, who had been raised on a diet of turnips and cabbage since birth,….the closest that Medway’s young side had ever come to a vegetable was when Glen Stapleton was playing.
Medway were without regulars, Corker, Stapleton, Krasij, Gwilliam and Chris Green. The latter had slipped a disc after some vigorous rumpy-pumpy the night before.
The game took shape from the outset, with DAB kicking for territory, and then attempting to dominate in the set piece. They were rewarded with two early unconverted tries.
Up against a much heavier pack, Medway’s forwards fought valiantly, and even edged the scrums. After a period of good possession, Medway won the ruck out wide, and spun the soap across the backs. The soap went loose, bobbed-around for a while, and then got knocked-on……..everyone stopped awaiting the inevitable signal for a scrum……no signal came…..winger James Rutherpube picked up the soap and walked over unimpeded to score. Jackson slotted the conversion, and Medway were back in it.
The remainder of the first half saw an exchange of penalty kicks for both sides. DAB had the better of the half, but could not breach Medway’s superb defence, lead by Drummond, Thompson, French, Thomas and Stewart.
Half time 13-10.
Medway started strongly, and drove up field through their tireless forwards….they were unlucky not to be awarded two scores through footballing ponce Matt Kelly, and winger Sam Bunce….neither touchdown was given.
DAB continued to kick at every opportunity, and were rewarded with a try, after a powerful run close in by their strong centre.
Medway responded immediately. Following some excellent touch-finders from Jackson and flyhalf Richard Bates…Medway’s pack applied pressure…..they were rewarded with a penalty in the home side’s 22…..Jackson, nervous of his own kicking ability, was thrilled to see Andy Connell offering himself for the crash-ball option….one quick pass later and Connell crashed over beside the posts.. Jackson was right to be nervous ! (18-15).
The game entered it’s crucial phase….DAB brought on a huge man to add further bulk to am already sizeable pack. This gave them just enough momentum to drive Medway back in the contact, their maul, which had been effective all afternoon became a strong weapon for them. From two strong drives, they were able to score two unconverted tries.
With fifteen minutes remaining, it stopped raining…..this was the cue for Medway to open the game up. Good possession upfront, particularly in the lineout from Mark Stewart and flanker Joel Jenkins, saw Medway spin the ball at every opportunity, mostly from deep within their 22. They made good ground, and cut DAB’s backs to pieces, with breaks from Coney, Drummond and Kempt.
The pressure told, and after more great rucking from the forwards, the ball was passed wide, winger Rutherpube unselfishly drew the last man to put Coney over in the corner. Jackson nervous.
Medway continued to attack, but time was against them, and the final whistle saw DAB victorious 28-20. As the final whistle sounded, the DAB Chairman flicked a switch in the clubhouse,….. the rain stopped and the sun came out, bloody typical !
Special mention must go to debut hooker Graeme Hellyer, who played superbly all match…despite his nose bleeding like a virgin all game. Vaseline is only effective up-to a point in sport, as in life.
Dick of the day went to Geoff Kempt for dropping virtually everything thrown at him, despite insisting that he could catch anything.
Man of the match went deservedly to Matt Kelly, for an outstanding all round display.
G.Kempt
Scribe.
Medway 67 Dover III 34
10 October 2009
Priestfields was the place to be on Saturday, if you wanted to watch exciting running rugby. Medway Extras put on a storming display, to despatch Dover in front of a vocal home crowd.
Captain Jackson, demanded a more dynamic performance from his forwards, and better use of the ball by the backs, after the previous week’s narrow victory over Aylesford.
Vice Captain Jamie Settle, still on the injury list, threw in his own ‘choice’ words of encouragement, from the crèche in the corner of the changing room….( Daddy,….. what does b*ll*cks mean ?)
Medway started at a cracking pace that Dover could not compete with. Several forward bursts from prop Nick Thomas ( always energetic in the first minute), provided the platform for the ball to go wide…..winger James Rutherford dived in for the opening score. From the restart, the kick-off was gobbled-up like a huge piece of coffee-cake by Nick Thomas (second minute, slowing up), from the ensuing ruck, fast ball saw outside centre Dave Gwilliam turn on the burners….as he was tackled out wide, he delivered a smart wrap-around pass to flying fullback Rich Coney, who gassed it in for the second score.
Another kick-off, and an exhaused Nick Thomas stopped licking Paul Meringue’s neck for long enough, as he spotted more coffee cake heading his way…..another huge chunk was consumed. The ball was secured, and after several powerful drives by Andy Connell and Howard Thompson….flyhalf Richard Bates chipped a kick into space behind Dover’s winger. Winger Geoff Kempt, who after 20 years at Medway can judge the bounce of a rugby ball perfectly, snaffled-up the ball and raced in for try number three.
Dover exerted more pressure, and were rewarded with a penalty in front, and a try in the corner….Rutherford’s side.
At this point Medway lost their most influential player, as flanker Bear Stapleton left the field with a dislocated thumb. (He says it happened during a tackle….which just goes to show, you can’t tackle and suck your thumb at the same time.) He was replaced by mid-life-crisis Chris Green, fresh from his latest Back-Sack-and-Crack.
Fullback Coney, who looks back to his best, raced in out wide for the next score.
Dover responded with one of their own in the corner….Rutherford’s side again.
Captain Jackson berated his troops……although Medway were dominant in winning ball and attacking…they kept gifting soft tries to their opponents, through lack of concentration, and basic errors. It was Jackson who took control, firstly with a number of excellent clearing kicks as Dover threatened….and secondly with an outstanding tap-tackle on the Dover winger as he was clean through…unfortunately Joyce was looking the other way Matt. The forwards pushed up field again, and Medway looked to exploit the blind side…slick hands put ‘fit for the first time in his life’ Dave French clear on the outside….he rode two tackles before popping the ball back inside for Geoff Kempt to score his second.
Again Dover responded, and were extremely lucky to be awarded a try on the stroke of half time, as their excellent flanker crashed over. Although it was clearly held-up by Medway, the ref gave the try….Andy Connell politely discussed this decision with the referee, and pointed out to his team mates that although it appeared harsh, that they must all behave like grown-ups and respect his decision.
Half time saw the scores very tight at 27 – 24….which was amazing considering Medway’s dominance….however with Medway scoring in multiples of 5 (Jacko saucepan) and Dover scoring in multiples of 7, this was not entirely surprising.
Medway woke up for part-two……and it was their forwards who created the attacking platform. With Mark Krasij hitting his lineout jumpers and working hard in the rucks….and Mark Stewart and Paul Meringue popping up everywhere in defence and attack, the game started to drift away from Dover. The introduction onto the wing of Luke Burns, his ‘thousand yard stare’ can be worrying for those who don’t know him, did not help Dover’s cause………the introduction of Guff Thomas onto the other wing probably did.
The second half turned into the Craig Drummond and Burnsy Show…..(brings back memories of Keith Harris and Orville…..no…..no humour there.)
Burnsy and Drummond swapped tries for the remainder of the half, Burnsy(4) and Drummond(3)….with a display of powerful, balanced, straight running........brilliant.
Dover, to their credit, never gave up…..and continued to make a game of it right up to the final whistle……they were rewarded for their efforts with two late tries.
Captain Jackson applauded his team through the tunnel, ….although the backs had scored all the points, it was the forwards who had done all the hard work to get them there.
Despite many of the tries being scored under the posts…..extensive discussion in the bar afterwards, could only recall one or two saucepans from Jacko. Indeed, he was formally presented with a shiny new saucepan from the club kitchen during the second half, to use as a kicking tee. He declined in true Jacko fashion, and instead slotted a peach from the touchline…….and then turned to his supporters and showed them how long his middle finger is. (Joyce.)
Dick of the Day was awarded to Andy Connell, for his ‘toys-out-of–the-pram’ reaction to the held-up try, and for threatening to punch-out anyone’s lights who disagreed with him.
Man of the Match went to Mark Stewart, who had been dropped the previous week, for a Dover player……his new technique of rubbing deep-heat into his nipples before the match was clearly working.
C’mon Medway.
G. Kempt
Scribe.
Aylesford III 17 Medway Extra First 22
As the wind swept across the open plains of the dustbowl, the cries of the wildebeest could be heard from the touchline…..you could be forgiven for believing that you were on safari in The Serengeti or deep in The Okavango Delta……not so……you would be in Aylesford on a Saturday afternoon…..the only wildebeest in sight (Humphreys, Weobley and Farbrace.)
Medway Extras resumed their league campaign against a team they had always been a close second to in recent seasons. During the preceding week, Captain Jackson had sent numerous Churchillian texts to his team insisting on maximum commitment to the cause.
The first half saw Medway playing into the duststorm, and from the start it was clear that Medway had adopted the ‘Neville Chamberlain’ approach, rather than the Churchillian one.
Poor defence, poor options, and loads of hot-potato rugby saw Medway yield three soft tries. The situation was not improved by the loss of eightees throwback Chris Green, who has a pressing engagement with Gok Wan’s fashion police……..and Paul Meringue, who had to leave the field with a hangover, after three babyshams and a tizer the previous evening.
At 17 – 0 down, many teams would have rolled-over, however the Medway boys are no soft-touches, and the introduction of Peter Corker and Birdy Mike Harrison had a galvanising effect. From the first concerted sequence of Medway play, a series of quick rucks saw the ball released to the backs…outside centre David Gwilliam spotted an opening, and dived over near the posts. Jackson, who’s role as kicker is under threat, stepped-up to add the extras.
Almost immediately, Medway struck again. A blind-side break enabled Geoff Kempt and Rich Coney to combine to move the ball into the home side’s twenty-two. Aylesford killed the ball at the ensuing ruck. Jacko moved the ball wide from the penalty, and centre Craig Drummond powered over. Jackson, who’s role as kicker is under threat, stepped-up to add the extras.
Half Time 17 – 14. ( Words of wisdom from Coach Dave Tasker at the interval….’’ Thirty-five minutes of pure shite, followed by five minutes of quality.’’)
With the wind at their backs, and their tails up….Medway applied huge pressure from the restart. Aylesford adopted the ‘stick it up the jumper’ defence, and used their larger forwards to constantly thwart Medway’s attacks. With Glen Stapleton tackling everything that moved, and numerous powerful thrusts from props Aaron Sage and Nick Thomas, the chances were sure to come.
After twenty minutes, Aylesford were penalised yet again for an infringement at the break down……wisely Captain Jackson, who’s role as kicker is under threat, opted for the kick at goal. Straight in front of the posts, wind behind, twenty yards out, even Stephen Hawkin could kick it….Jackson missed, saucepan.
As Medway’s forwards created the attacking platform, Medway’s backs conspired to waste numerous scoring opportunities. Top of the list, Dave Gwilliam, who dropped two chances when clean through, and seemed to lose the ability to deliver a simple pass when the overlap was on…..(Dick of the Day.) Medway did cross the home side’s line ten minutes from the end, as winger James Rutherford went over from a slick ‘delta’ move in the backs, however, by the time the referee had arrived, Aylesford had buried the ball and turfed-over the evidence…..no try, unbelievable.
Medway were becoming more and more desperate, …..who do you need to steady the ship in a crisis ?..........usually the Captain…...I know….. enough said……so the team looked to cool-hand-Bates at flyhalf…..with five minutes to go, and under extreme pressure from his opposite number, Batesy went for an audacious drop goal. The ball seemed to take an age to cross the bar, but it did, and Medway were level.
As time ebbed away, Medway continued to push for the win….and from a scrum five yards out…it fell to flanker Glen Stapleton to pick up and dive over for the deserved winning score. Jackson, who’s role as kicker is under threat, stepped-up to miss the extras.
The full-time whistle heralded much celebration. An outstanding comeback win, said a huge amount about the Medway side’s spirit and character……although, it was Medway alone, who had put themselves into such a difficult position. Greater control and application of basic skills will be needed for the matches ahead.
Man of the Match, again…….Bear (Glen Stapleton)….understated genius.
G. Kempt
Scribe.
Medway Extra First XV 31 Tonbridge Juddians III 17
League, 19 September 2009
The first league match of the season, saw Medway Extras entertain a dangerous Tonbridge Juddians side at Priesfields.
A number of injuries especially in the front row, had given the selectors and Captain Jackson a real headache during the week, and the issue was not fully resolved until the afternoon of the match. The team would like to thank Tony, Larry, Neil, Nigel and Gavin from the Fourth Team for their assistance in the matter. Props Nick Thomas and Neil Sword stepped-up like a collision in a blimp factory, and gave an excellent performance on the day, more than equalling a tough TJ’s pack. Well done guys.
The game was hard fought from the start, with TJs applying strong pressure in the contact area…..Medway were slow to get into their stride, and conceded the first points to a TJs penalty for hands in the ruck.
This jolted Medway into action, and after 10 minutes TJs themselves were penalised for the same infringement on halfway. Without hesitation, Captain Jackson took a quick tap and set off on an incredible slalom run to the line,…. he twisted left and right, pirouetted numerous times, and without ever actually running in a straight line once, managed to make the try line for the opening score. Unbelievable. Still dizzy from his run, he missed the conversion…. ( although this could just be that he’s a crap kicker.)
Medway entered into a period of competitive forward battles, which they edged. Great work in the loose from locks Mark Stewart, and ‘mid-life crisis’ Chris Green (all hair straighteners and leather posing-pouch) certainly contributed to this dominance. This platform enabled moustachioed flyhalf Richard Bates to release his strong back line. From a good lineout, the ball was spun to centre Luke Burns who hit a straight line through the opposition centres, he rounded the fullback to score under the posts. Jacko saucepan.
TJs continued to apply pressure, and Medway’s defence had to stay strong. A clearance kick from the visitor’s flyhalf, was collected by fullback Rich Coney deep in his own half. In familiar fashion he cut a great outside arc, and used his sprinter’s pace to go round and then outpace the TJ’s backs, to score a great try in the corner. Memories of last season, and a real confidence booster. Jacko saucepan.
Medway then lost the services of their dangerous inside centre Brian Walpole with a shoulder injury, after a series of solid defensive tackles. Medway were able to bring on substitute back Craig Drummond in his place, and Drummond wasted no time in getting into the game. From a loose pass, he cut back through the opposition forwards, clearly one of his favourite things to do, and turned on the burners to smash through and score under the posts. Jacko saucepan.
With half-time beckoning, Medway let their concentration slip, and allowed the opposition centre to ‘do a Drummond’…and register a converted try just before the half-time whistle.
HALF TIME 24 – 10.
Tonbridge Juddians are an excellent side, and remained dangerous throughout…they started the second-half as they had finished the first, and after a period of sustained pressure, they registered a second converted try from the back of a lineout.
Medway got very jittery at this stage, and lost the playing structure that had seen four first half tries. A number of penalties were conceded resulting in lost field position, and any useful back’s ball was wasted or snuffed out by TJ’s midfield defence.
Medway did threaten on occasion, and were rewarded with the chance to extend their lead, after TJs were penalised near to their posts. The recently ordained (seriously) skipper Captain Jackson stepped forward, placed his kicking tee on the ground, lined-up the kick, swung his trusty right foot forward’ and with God by his side…….. batted the ball into the carpark with another saucepan. Twat, amen.
The pressure was therefore straight back on, and Medway had to defend resolutely, lead by back-row trio Peter Corker, Glen Stapleton and Dave French. The home side’s cause was not helped by an injury to hooker Howard Thompson. This saw substitute Nigel Gutteridge brought on, and with the addition of Mike Harrison at second row…..this increased experienced saw Medway regain some of the control of earlier in the match. Medway started to hold onto the ball more, and create phases, which saw them push TJs back up field. As the match neared fulltime, a break from a lineout by the hard-working Corker and Stapleton, saw Jacko release quick ball to the backs. It would have been a simple run in for Burnsy, but amazingly he did something that he’s never done before………he passed…………..no one was more surprised than winger James Rutherford, who had virtually showered and gone home by that stage. He gleefully snapped-up this rare gift, and dived over out wide. Jacko saucepan.
This brought the full time whistle, and a hard earned victory for Medway.
Dick-of-the-day was awarded to Dave French for squandering the easiest two man overlap in the history of rugby midway through the second half…..not like we needed a try at that point, hey Frenchy ?
Man-of-the-match was awarded to Glen Stapleton for his usual hard working, tireless efforts at open-side flanker. Glen had to perform a waltz on the veranda with Rachael Burford prior to receiving his award, as it has recently been revealed that Glen is currently taking ballroom dancing lessons…..all the mums say ‘ahh’. I’m sure with his frilly-ruff shirt, coiffured Ginger locks, and sequined sailor’s outfit flapping in the breeze, he must be considered a catch for any young girls or confused young men. Strictly not rugby.
FULL-TIME 31 – 17.
G. Kempt
Scribe.
Medway Extra First XV v Erith
12 September 2009
Medway’s Second Fifteen (Extras) kicked-off the new season with a friendly against Erith, and carried on from where they left off last season.
Under the divine leadership of Reverend Matthew Jackson, and Vice-Captain Jamie Doghouse Settle, Medway set about their task from the first minute. Reverend Jackson dummied the defence from a mid-field scrum, and executed a perfect switch with suntanned Yogi flyhalf Geoff Kempt who raced in from 50 metres. The next 10 minutes was a frantic affair as Medway blew-off the summer months by conveniently forgetting years of training, and trying to play everything at 100 miles per hour. Needless to say, penalties were conceded, passes were dropped, and poor decisions taken. Medway regrouped, and started to play with more control and structure….by winning their set-piece, and controlling the breakdown, they were able to attack through their dynamic backs with a number of well executed strike moves.
The loss of Jamie Settle after 20 minutes with an ankle injury seemed to spur Medway on.
Next to score was enigmatic centre Luke Burns, who broke the visitors defence to score, after a great lineout take by Glen ‘Bear’ Stapleton. It was Bear who scored next after receiving a rare pass from fullback Tom Willoughbelly after a blind-side break.
Medway’s forwards were secure in all areas, with excellent work from new recruits second-row Gareth Head and blind-side flanker Peter Corker. (Both are strawberry blondes like Captain Jackson.)
A slick ‘delta’ move in the backs enabled James Rutherford to sell his opposite number with the old ‘in-and-out’ to dive over out wide.
Further tries followed, firstly for Tom Greedybelly, and a second for Luke Greedyburns.
On the stroke of half-time, a great phase of interpassing between forwards and backs, saw newly athletic flanker Dave French put Burnsy away for a first-half hatrick.
HALF TIME. (Coach and mentor Dave Tasker was not impressed, as he lambasted the team for their lack of team ethic, and poor use of superior possession…..fair one.)
Erith, to their credit, started the second-half strongly, and Medway had to work harder to re-establish their dominance. Great rucking and clearing out by Mark Stewart and the impressive Mark Krasij helped to put Medway back on top.
Medway ran the ball at every opportunity, and were more expansive with their passing…..this yielded tries for mute centre Craig Drummond and a fourth for Burnsy.
Good, consistent ball from the base of the scrum from Jackson saw more gaps exploited out wide,…. Burnsy eased in from 70 metres for a fifth which prompted a team decision not to pass to him anymore.
Next on the score sheet in his Watership Down bunny costume was flighty winger Joel Jenkins, who managed to dive away from the line and rotate his body in mid-air to score. Unique.
Willoughbelly wobbled in for the next score, as he injected his blancmange-like pace into the line to splat down out wide, conveniently ignoring the throng of supporting players around him.
The final score was a superbly executed crash ball to Shhhhh Drummond after great clean ball off the top of a lineout.
Captain Jackson slotted his usual array of wafty conversions throughout ( Howard says you kick like a saucepan Jacko.)
Medway must learn quickly before next week’s league opener to be more patient in attack, and to use the ball more effectively when they have it.
G.Kempt
Scribe.